Future wife,

I don't know who you are right now. I don't even know if I have met you already. I pray right now that God will cause our paths to cross so that we'll meet. I can't even imagine who the girl is that God has set aside for me, but I do know without a doubt that you are going to be one amazing woman. I'm excited to meet you, as well as to grow with you in a spiritual way. By faith, I am believing that our paths will cross suddenly. Give her the strength, Lord to resist any attacks of the enemy. I pray that God surrounds you with protection so that no harm will come to you. And Lord, give me the strength to resist any attack from the devil as well. Give me patience.

I just want to encourage you to follow your dreams. God didn't give you those passions to give up on. Trust and cling to Him. Listen and seek.  Though I man not be present, just know that I am praying for you every step of the way.

With love,

Your future Husband

It's hard to believe that I still get carded when I buy an "M" rated video game or an "R" rated movie. I'm flattered when I get the occasional you don't look your age, but I'm a kid anymore.  I remember this one time when I was younger, a bunch of us from my family went to Pizza Hut for dinner. Typical mother, father, brother, grandparents, cousins, and their parents. Everyone at the table got an adult sized cup except me...I was given a small plastic cup. Even then I didn't look my age...which is good I suppose and I guess I'll take it.

 

A lot things that you did as a kid, you probably no longer do. Some things carry over to an extent. Take me, for example. I still play video games. Maybe not as much as I did when I was a kid, but I still get enjoyment out of it. 

So I've finished up my duties at work and now I'm taking a break. I cant wait for these 12 hour shifts to end; they're definitely not me. I'm more of an A.M. 6:30 - 2:30  person. I'm praying I'll get to pick my own hours like everyone else here soon.

  

PE teacher today

Today was good day; I was able to be a substitute teacher for a local school. It was my first time ever subbing for a PE teacher. All in all it wasn't a bad experience at all. I got the call on the night before and was hesitant on accepting it the offer because I work another job that starts at 6pm on Friday night and goes to 6 a.m. on Saturday. I usually try to sleep for the most part of day on Friday because I go in to work for a 12 hour shift, so working as a Substitute from 7:15 until 12:30 is rough. Getting up at 5 a.m. working until 12:30 and then coming home to trying and get a few hours sleep seemed rather...hard...but here I am.

Aside from the super long day that I'm still working on, it was fun. Things have changed from when I was a kid though. Some of the things that go on, I as a kid would have never done and nor did the kids I went to school with. At one point during the day -lunch time actually, this kid came up to me while I was on lunch duty, give me a hug and said he liked me as his substitute. It's the little things like that make your day. I was surprised at how many students remembered my name. Giving more thought to it, I really need to get back on the study wagon and study for my tests to become a teacher.

Future wife...

The a few days ago I kept waking up throughout night. I wasn't sure exactly what it was; I shrugged it off as not being able to sleep. After about 4th time I knew it was something; I could feel it. It was just one of those deep down gut feelings. I didn't know what to pray. I just knew that I needed to pray for you. I know God was speaking to you that night and I pray that you heard...

That's my biggest pray. Lord, give me eyes to see and ears to hear. Speak to me; be that voice that guides me. Give me eyes to see so that I will be able to react faster. 

I pray that God is #1 in your life. Keep Him the center and you'll never go wrong. I pray protection over you and your family so that nothing ill will come against you. Just know that I am praying for you every step you take. I hope you feel God's presence around you at all times.

After a short hiatus

It's been awhile since my last post...


I've actually been thinking about going on hiatus from all of this. The thought of "What's the point?" continues to plague my thought process. It's not the right attitude to have and I understand that. It's just been hard that past couple of months.


Have you ever wished you knew God's complete plan and purpose for your life? Who you're going to be with, where you're going to live, what kind of job you're going to have? Would we even be able to handle or comprehend what that plan is? In all reality, most likely not, but it would still be nice to know.


Being single sucks. When everyone around you is already in or is getting in a relationship or  getting married...you seen them and how happy they...it kind of makes you feel like the odd person out.


I guess this is all coming from an inexperienced dater (if that's even a word). I have no clue where to meet people. I don't work in a building with an abundance of single woman (if any at all). Males out umber females 10:1, so meeting people in the work place is ruled out. There are no single women in my church, so that 's out. My friend circle is really small so meeting someone though friends is out of the question. Point in short is, it's very hard for me to meet single women. I'm not the type of guy to really try online dating  because I think it's a sham; a complete and utter waste of time.


I also suppose I sell myself short a lot of the time...
I feel that I have nothing to offer or that I'm always overlooked; overshadowed.  I've been blown off more times that I can count for "being too short." I'm always the nice guy but never boyfriend material. I can't help that I'm short; I can't change it. There is nothing that I can physical do that will make to grow taller other than praying to God an believe for a miracle that He will cause my genes alter themselves thus allowing me to grow taller.


They say that you have to love yourself before you can love another person. If that's the case then so be it. I absolutely hate myself for being short. I hate that I am always overlooked for something I have no control over or can change. Of course, being short does have it's advantages, however most women don't want to be with a guy under 6'.


There's some woman out there for me...just haven't found her yet.